Learning to Breathe

Indira is 16-years-old and has left her home on Mariner’s Cay for the city of Nassau where she will live with her aunt, uncle and two cousins. This setting will provide her with better education and a new start in a place where people don’t know her mother and, therefore, don’t assume that Indy is just a carbon copy of the woman who drinks too much and is happy to go with any man who comes along. But Indy’s life and plans for the future begin to unravel when she finds out she is pregnant and she has to do whatever she can to hide it from the people around her.

Indy is a remarkable main character who faces challenges and problems with an amazing inner strength. Although she has moments of doubt and uncertainty as she navigates her new surroundings and her new physical reality, she proves to be strong and resilient. She does not let fear and loneliness overcome her. Eventually she finds both supportive people and a safe place which provide the security which is lacking in her own family, and this helps her face the present with new assurance and the future with more hope and optimism.

While the book revolves around Indy, there are interesting secondary characters as well. They tend to be depicted as primarily good or bad while Indy is a more textured and multi-faceted character. On the positive side, there is Grammy. While she has made some poor decisions regarding both her own daughter and Indy, there is no doubt that Grammy loves her granddaughter dearly and has her best interests at heart. Churchy is a teenager and friend who does his best to listen to Indy and provide support and friendship as best he can.

On the other side of the coin is Indy’s Nassau family. Her uncle travels a great deal, and so Indy is left with Aunt Patrice who resents having another mouth to feed and assumes that Indy will undoubtedly turn out as badly as her mother. Cousin Smiley tries to befriend Indy, but she is younger and has her own life with friends and activities which keep her busy. Cousin Gary is the worst of the lot, and his abusive treatment of Indy permeates the entire novel with a sense of disgust and dismay for readers and underlines Indy’s lack of power and control in her new situation.

The title of the novel refers to what becomes Indy’s sanctuary and one of the few safe places for her – a yoga retreat. The staff members are understanding and empathetic, and the retreat, itself, is quiet and near the sea so Indy can find some space and some peace of mind. She eventually learns to practice some of the yoga poses and the deep breathing associated with yoga and so is able to calm herself and gather herself in other, more intense, situations.

Janice Lynn Mather is a Bahamian writer, and so it seems natural that she would set her first novel in the Caribbean. While the story could take place anywhere in the world, Mather surrounds her readers with the sights and sounds of the Bahamas. We can almost taste and smell the food, feel the heat, appreciate the vivid colours and hear the patois as spoken by native Bahamians. Mather presents both the good and the grit of the Bahamas that she knows rather than the tourist beaches and five-star hotels.

In this coming-of-age novel, Indy learns self-esteem and self-reliance, and readers watch her mature in a truly heart-wrenching situation. She must deal with the reality of a teen pregnancy, and the options of abortion, adoption and keeping the child all enter into her decision-making. The ending of the story is satisfying although it seems a little rushed, given the slower and steadier pace of the rest of the book.

While I happily give this novel a five star, ‘Highly Recommended’ rating, it is not a book for every young adult reader. Indy’s emotions are intense and often lean toward self-blame despite the fact that she is a victim. The theme of sexual assault is the backbone of the story and can make the book difficult, almost suffocating, to read in places. Learning to Breathe is an eye-opening account of this young woman’s struggle to make good choices in her life, but it is also challenging and unsettling in its subject matter. Thank you, Janice Lynn Mather, for bringing this difficult topic to readers as it is so appropriate for society at this moment in time.