Critical
Critical
[Maryn] entered the school through its heavy oak doors and darted to the bathroom off the atrium. Good. Nobody here. She went to the sink, pulled back her hood, and splashed cold water on her face. She studied herself in the mirror. Red nose, blotchy face, puffy eyes. Great. What now?
She opened one of the stall doors, sat down on the toilet, and locked the door. She took out her phone.
"Coach?" she typed.
Ten seconds later, three dots appeared telling her that Coach was typing a response.
“Hi”
She paused, panicking for a moment. What should she say? Should she wait until she needed Coach's advice before telling him anything? Or should she wait until they could get together in person, just the two of them? She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, taking stock of her true feelings. When she opened her eyes, she knew in her heart that Coach was a key person, and that she wanted to tell him right away.
“Mom has breast cancer” Maryn's entire body trembled.
Coach's response came quickly.
“Scary news. Your dad told me this morning. How are you?”
“ok” she typed. She took some more deep breaths to calm herself and then continued.
“I'm mad…but why?”
“you have had a big shock”
“true” She sighed. She really appreciated Coach putting a name to it. Shock. That seems exactly right.
“all feelings are legit”
“thanks coach” Her eyes welled up with tears again. This time she let them slip down her cheeks.
In Book 3 of the “Maryn O’Brien” series, mountain-biker Maryn, now in grade 11, is thrown off the precise training schedule she has designed to help her achieve her ultimate dream of making the Olympic team. This is because she learns, early in the school year, that her young, otherwise healthy mother has breast cancer. Maryn helps as much as possible, including driving her mom to and from chemotherapy sessions. Furthermore, in order to honor her mother's wish to keep as few people as possible informed about her cancer diagnosis, Maryn must choose carefully in whom she will confide. This causes her additional stress. During hospital visits, she makes friends with a retired teacher who encourages her to think about how reading Shakespeare's Macbeth can help with her own life. By the end of Critical, Mom has successfully made it through chemo and radiation; and Maryn's boyfriend, Liam, has decided he isn't the right person for Maryn since she chose to confide in her girlfriend for several months rather than him.
In Critical, Maryn learns some worthy life lessons and gains some self-awareness. For instance, everyone who excels at sports works hard to (not just her); 'blind ambition' is not the path to success; she needs to communicate better with people close to her. Maryn's brother, parents, coach, and friend Janey are credibly sketched. In Critical, the reader gets a strong sense of Maryn's feelings for her mother and her own Olympic dream. And yet, this reader still felt a distinct distance from the protagonist. However, Maryn's observations and questions about cancer and the side effects of treatment could be helpful to a young person with a similarly afflicted family member. Throughout, Critical would have benefitted from more extensive editing as well as a lighter touch in terms of teaching life lessons.
Karen Rankin is a Toronto, Ontario, teacher and writer of children’s stories.